I always remember when my girl said god I wish you could look like that guy from the mummy, Brandon Fraser.  I sent her these pictures and am like "what you want me to be the big white Buddha".   In Brandon's defense he is a Lions fan and they went 0-16 this season which lead to a tragic spiral of ding dongs and hoe hoe's. Now Brandon is so fat that he can't even see his penis. Look at the bright side though at least Brandon Fraser can afford Spittzers call girl to get his rocks off.